I'm currently in Bologna, Italy, soaking up the final days of my trip here. A trip that has consisted of long days hiking around the Amalfi coast in the sun, island hopping to Capri and Ischia and getting my queer heart indulged in the arty, inner-city delights here in Bologna.
After weeks of being in each other's pocket and navigating tricky moments together (hiking directions, dinner decisions and other small things that are destined when being in such close proximity), my partner and I have appreciated being here in the city and having some spaciousness to do some juicy client sessions and wander the streets until the sun sets.
Both me and my partner require a lot of space in our everyday lives and get a lot from recharging separately (me especially) - and it's been interesting noting how when I've not had chance to have space some old thought patterns and people pleasing/self-abandonment qualities have come in. It's really hard for me in those moments to access how I'm feeling, let alone what I need - but as soon as I get a little space, I can come back to myself and the contractions and hyper-vigilance ease off, and my heart grows and expands once again.
So, this morning, after rousing my partner with some delicious sleepy play, I took myself off in the early dawn with the swifts chirping in the air and the promise of the day all around to sit with these epic Deodar Cedar trees in Giardini Margherita.
These beautiful trees are the national tree of Pakistan, said to be spiritual gateways and representations of Lord Shiva.
Sometimes when life gets busy and my head whirls and swirls, I can forget how important it is to be alone with the trees, for regulation, for ground, for endings and beginnings and reflections.
The trees help me to connect to myself and to earth, and therefore to others.
To think that our relationship with nature does not contain the blueprints for our relationship to all things would be silly. This is where we come from, and to where we will return.
And when we are feeling lost in our human relations, turning to nature can provide simplicity and solice. Here is where we can begin to build authentic, reciprocal connection and consistent holding.
If your relationship to nature was the blueprint for your relationship to others, would it be a healthy one?
Love, R x
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